Wednesday, March 10, 2010

.the future.

I just applied to two different positions. (and I literally mean just) I am graduating in a few months and I really want to get a job right away. I know how difficult it is to find work currently and I figured that if I found something that I wanted, I might as well apply for it. It is funny, graduating with a business admin. degree is like a wild card in uno- really it can be whatever you want it to be. A while back my Dad asked me what I was planning on using my degree for. I had no idea. I think that I spouted off something about HR or something like that. However, I really didn't know until last Saturday morning.

I was sitting half asleep in a class and a "career counselor" came in to talk to us. I was getting annoyed with this women trying to explain how easy it really was to figure out what you were supposed to do with your life. She mentioned a whole slew of self examining career tests that we should all take. Yeah, I have taken them all and according to my personality and "likes" I should be a marine biologist or in retail. Um... no thank you. I don't care for science too much and well, retail isn't my life long dream. (although I DID have a lot of fun when I worked at the Home Depot but I digress) I have taken some tests that have told me that I need to be an entrepreneur and others that told me that I need the consistency of government jobs. Honestly, I think that I would do best in a structured job like within the government or in other large organizations.

Anyway, that is when it hit me. When I was sitting listening to this woman talk I got an envious feeling. She was viewed as an "expert" by everyone in the class (well except for sour ole me). She was super organized. She had color coded flags on her sheets that matched the colors that she used in each section of her powerpoint presentation. She was super structured and everything was arranged perfectly and I was getting excited. To some that don't know me so well, you might not understand but I am a complete control freak that needs and dare I say thrives on organization. I make endless lists. (sometimes even lists to remind myself to make lists) I function best when I have everything all lined up perfectly and all is clear. Dan makes fun of me for this but I actually now think that it is great.

I decided at that moment, while getting envious of this woman's incredible organizational system, that I needed to put this umm, nuance of mine to work... literally. I want to be an adviser. I want to help others become organized or if not that, do all of the work and tell them what they have to do. I want to work for a University's admissions office or Financial Aid office. I just applied for one of each of them. I would love to be an academic adviser but you need a masters for that. I sort of wish that the two jobs would be smooched into one as each of them has superior points. One is for my current school University of Baltimore in the admissions office. The job would be fun and I would be so proud to work for my school but the pay is well, not the best at all. Then the other job is for the financial aid office at Johns Hopkins University. The pay is better but it isn't my school. I most likely will not get either job since the market is so tough and I have been out of work for so long (Quinn is 3.5). However, I am starting to feel like myself again and it feels good.


Mom V said...

Michele - I am glad that you seem to have selected the direction that you want to go in. I must admit that it saddens me to think that you state 'you are starting to feel like myself again and it feels good'
Child - you have become on of the best mothers and wives I have EVER met. I know that you are my kid ,but you have directed the care and develpement of Quinn at every turn. You are a selfless mother and spouse. The you of today is far superior to any of the old yous you reflect upon.
You could not have accomplished anything better in any job than you did with raising the self assured, polite, funny, independent Princess Quinn. That, my love, is your strong point. That is where you have excelled. Perhaps you could assist other parents of pre-mature babies learn how to fight for their special babies.
Please don't ever sell yourself short by thinking that you have not contributed to the family,, because you are the reason the family functions. Dan is a wonderful provider but you have learned how to make something out of nothing. Dan is a great father, but you have had a pivital role in every aspect of Quinn's life. Quinn is the way she is because of you and all that you do for and with her.
I am so proud of how you manage your home, your marriage and your special little daughter. No job accomplishment could ever make me feel as proud as these accomplishments. Please don't look for a job to define who you are and if you are successful. YOU ARE SUCCESSFUL aready is the matters of the heart and the matters that are important.

I love you and am so glead that I had a little something to do with you and who you have become. You are what I want to be when I grow up.

Love and admiration,

emlizalmo said...

Amen, Caroline. That was beautiful and so, SO true. You are amazing, Michele. Hope you know it. I understand the whole challenging yourself thing though. You will be great at whatever you do. <3

O family said...

Well- thanks Mom and Amy. It isn't that I don't value being a Mom and wife, because I LOVE IT. it is just that by nature I am aggressive and assertive and I like being that way. That is a whole side of me that hasn't been able to "show itself" in over 3 years. I want to be able to do it all. :)

Valerie Robbins said...

I am so glad that you have figured out what you want to do with your degree! You will be great at it! I've done those tests to see what I should be & they NEVER narrow my list down..they always make it longer! ah!