Recently Quinn has been a handful. She threw her first real temper tantrum ever the other day... and we were out getting produce. It was seriously horrific. (involved screams, foot stomping, me throwing basket towards employee yelling at me for running out the door with said basket, and lots and lots of yelling- she might have even growled at one point)
I was so lost as for what to do in the situation. Normally, I can just talk to her. If that doesn't work, I can give her the threat of having to be in time out. Most of the time the threat alone is enough but there have been times when she has actually had to sit there for a moment or two.
Well at the store:
*I tried to talk to her
*To come up with a solution to her problem
*To get away from the situation that was stressing her out
*To talk to her again, to tell her that "this behavior is NOT acceptable!" in a firm voice
*To even threaten time out
*To take away her toys in the car and explain that this type of behavior doesn't get fun rewards
then I actually threatened to spank her.
yup
Quinn doesn't get spanked. I don't really have a problem with other parents doing it, I just know that it isn't what is right for Quinn, Dan and myself. I would never want to spank/hit/smack my baby while I was mad and well, at this point I was pretty livid.
Anyway, we made it home and I put her in her room to let her (and myself) calm down.
(we talked and everything has been pretty much fine since)
****************************************************************
A few days later I heard Quinn playing in her room and talking to her toys.
She said, "my Mommy spanks me all of the time" or something like that.
So I went in and talked to her and explain that she hasn't been spanked and I explained exactly what that is. I told her how spankings hurt and time out doesn't.
Then she looked at me with tears in her eyes and her little bottom lip quivering and said, "but Mommy- time out hurts me. It hurts my heart"
oh boy, she is so sweet and this parenting thing can be kind of tough sometimes
5 comments:
Parenting really is tough...and mid-tantrum is the toughest. It really tests us and shows us what we are made of. I am a "lose your voice because you just screamed so loud" kind of gal when we are having one of those HORRIFIC melt downs (which thankfully is not very often). I'm really proud of you and the way you handled things Michele. You are such a good mom.
Shel - You are a spectacular Mom. I love that little Quinn reminds you about the non-physical kind of hurt, because that is the kind we seem to remember forever. Keep up the good work. Get Q ready for the DeeDee weekend; I can't wait!
Aren't those meltdowns the worst thing ever? You are sooo lucky that this is your first! Sweet,sweet Quinn....she is so darling with her"hurting heart".Of course I got all choked up when I read it. Love you all.
Not looking forward to melt downs! You seem to handle yourself well...not sure how I will do. And the "hurt heart" thing is sorta precious :)
We had a rough day yesterday with Piper. We were at Target getting school supplies and I promised the kids that if they were good they could get a slushie and soft pretzel. Piper was given many warnings of how if she didn't obey she would NOT get her slushie. She didn't obey and she did NOT get a slushie when all the other kids did. It was awful. She was crying and screaming and demanding to get what she wanted. I wanted to give in so bad but I didn't. I hope that she has learned that she will NOT get said promises if she doesn't keep her end of the deal. Parenting sucks!!! and yet I love it!
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